Life

8 Sex Myths You Need To Stop Believing Today

by Kristine Fellizar

Today is World Sexual Health Day, a global and volunteer celebration made to focus on sexual health and justice, sexual rights, and human rights. In 2010, the World Association for Sexual Health called upon their many organizations to bring social awareness to sex-related issues. Since that first celebration, 35 countries have participated in round table discussions, conferences, art exhibitions, and talks in local schools, hospitals, and libraries in order to break the fear and taboo that surrounds the topic of sexuality.

I, myself, am very open with the topic at hand, but that doesn’t necessarily mean everyone I know is the same way. While it seems like nowadays more people are open to talking about sex, there are still people out there — hi, Mom! — who still believe sex should only happen between two people who have declared before God that they will promise to stay together and populate the earth. But, as many of us know, that’s not exactly realistic.

It’s no secret that the state of sex ed in the U.S. is outdated. If you don’t think so, many countries around the world have more comprehensive and progressive sexual education programs that go above and beyond the simple abstinence or condoms talk. So, it’s not only necessary, but good to have a day that celebrates sexual health.

In honor of World Sexual Health Day, let’s celebrate the importance of sex education, erasing stigmas about sexuality, and communication in the bedroom and finally put these terrible sex myths to rest.

Myth #1: The Bigger, The Better

Bigger for the man’s ego, maybe. But not necessarily for the woman’s pleasure. In fact, many women say having sex with bigger penises tend to hurt more. Besides, the G-Spot is located two inches inside the vagina, so a bigger one might actually miss it completely. Regardless of size, it’s all about finding the right angles.

Myth #2: The First Time Hurts Like Hell

Not true. If she’s not aroused and well lubricated, it’s going to hurt. If the guy’s too rough and inattentive to his partner’s needs, it’s going to hurt. Other than that, it should actually be a relatively pleasurable experience for the both of you. Then again, sex is always awkward the first time around. But as they say, practice makes perfect.

Myth #3: You Won't Get Pregnant Using The Pull-Out Method

Even if your partner’s pull-out game is on point and you’ve been lucky enough to avoid the gift of life, according to Planned Parenthood, even if a man pulls out in time, pregnancy can still happen. Out of every 100 women whose partners use the withdrawal method, four will become pregnant — if it's done correctly. That number jumps up to 27 if the partner doesn’t.

While I totally get the fact that birth control isn’t cheap, an unplanned baby is far more expensive. If you need other more effective options for birth control, try looking into an IUD. Less than 1 out of 100 women who have an IUD will get pregnant.

Additionally, less than one out of every 100 women who take the Pill CORRECTLY (as in, take it on time, every single day) will get pregnant, and about nine out of 100 who don’t always use it correctly will get pregnant.

Myth #4: Men Think About Sex Every Seven Seconds

Sure, men might seem like the hornier, rowdier bunch, but let’s give them some credit here. They don’t think about sticking it into places all the time. In fact, a 2011 Ohio State University study of 120 male college students aged 18-25 found that men think about sex about 19 times a day. They think about food 18 times.

Myth #5: Using Condoms Will Give A Guy ED

I'm calling BS on this one. According to a recent study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, researchers took a sample of 479 heterosexual men between the ages of 18 and 24 who had used a condom during sex within the last 90 days in order to see whether erectile dysfunction was associated with condom usage. They found that 62 percent reported having condom-associated issues before, during, and after penetration. However, it was also found that those who reported having condom-associated erectile issues reported also having problems getting it up when no condoms were used.

Bottom line is, if he’s not getting it up, it’s not the condom’s fault.

Myth #6: He Has A Premature Ejaculation Problem. He Can't Even Last 10 Minutes In Bed

Sure, if he comes in less than two minutes, you can get frustrated. But don’t be so hard on your guy if he can’t last through a 10- or 20-minute sex session. In fact, a 2005 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that the average intravaginal ejaculation latency time (IELT) is 5.4 minutes. So, if your guy can last at least five minutes, then you should have no worries.

Myth #7: Women Who Have Sex On The First Dates Are Sluts

No, women who choose to have sex on the first date are not “easy.” Neither are women who choose to have casual sex. Neither are the women who have had sex with more than five guys, or 25 in their lifetime. Or any different variations of this subject, for that matter. It's time to stop slut-shaming each other.

On a related note, the idea that a woman’s vagina is loose means that she’s been around, is also BS.

"Women's vaginas don't change in size or shape based on how much or how little sex they've had or the size of their partner's penis," Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., an associate professor at Indiana University, and author of The Coregasm Workout told Men’s Health. "Vaginas are flexible and return to their original size."

It is 2015. Women have the ability to make their own decisions regarding their sexuality. In all honesty, what one woman decides to do or not do with her vagina is her own business. Who are we to judge?

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Images: Anna Demianenko/Unsplash; Gipihy (8)