Monday night's 'RHOBH' Was a fight-fest

Yes, Brandi Glanville's offensive comments were without a doubt the craziest part about Monday night's The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Glanville has never been one to mince words, but the racist remarks crossed the line. Not cool, brah. I don't mean to draw attention away from what she said, but I'd like to get into the other bonkers things that happened during their trip to Palm Springs. Specifically, the energy-sapping fights. I've watched a lot of reality television, so I've seen countless reality TV fights (my parents are so proud of me). Between the racist comments and the relentless arguing, I was tuckered out after the hour-long program. Here are just some of the mind-numbing tiffs that went down Monday night:

A Saleslady Attacks Kyle With Compliments

Kyle Richards and Carlton Gebbia go shopping for Palm Springs outfits. The saleslady starts complimenting Kyle's butt and says "you're always complaining to me about your body dysmorphia." And then she pelts her with compliments. Kyle barely responds, so the argument is sort of one-sided. Carlton is not feeling any of it.

Kyle Thinks Carlton Looks for Conflict

A few episodes ago, Kyle had Gebbia and others over for brunch. During said brunch, Kyle walked away in the middle of Carlton's story about a bird. Fast-forward to Monday night: Gebbia confronts Kyle about the bird story. Kyle is polite about it, but in her talking head, Kyle says,"I've offended you once, I've offended you twice, I can guarantee I'm probably gonna offend you again." So, all isn't exactly well. Gebbia continues to air all of her Kyle-related grievances with Kyle. In another talking head, Kyle says Carlton is "looking for tits on an ant," i.e., she is searching for something that isn't there. They two say they'll be straightforward with any issues they have with one another, but Kyle seems to prefer keeping it real only in the talking head.

Yolanda Almost Raises Hell Over Un-ironed Bedsheets

When the Housewives visit Palm Springs, Glanville, Gebbia, Lisa Vanderpump, and Yolanda Foster have to stay in the rental bungalows, not the main rental house with the other Housewives. Yolanda is pissed that the bedsheets in the bungalows are not ironed. She lets it be known that the bedsheets are not up to her standard.

Brandi Thinks Joyce's Name is "Jacqueline"

Glanville decides Joyce Giraud looks like a "Jacqueline." She calls her "Jacqueline" at least 34 times. Giraud gets pissed. Glanville refuses to let it go. She admits in a talking head that half of the time, she does it to annoy Giraud. "She doesn't look like a 'Joyce,'" Glanville drunkenly slurs at dinner. "'Joyce' sounds like a big fat pig." Ugh, Glanville. Such a nightmare. Giraud stays calm, but Glanville REFUSES TO LET IT GO.

Poolside Fights

When all of the Housewives hang out by the pool in Palm Springs, there's a weird fight about actually getting in the water. And there's a weird fight about removing coverups. Aggressive compliments happen. I thought sitting poolside meant relaxing, but I guess I'm wrong. According to RHOBH, it means bossing each other around until the tension is as thick as a collagen-injected lip.

Joyce Gets Judgy About Carlton's Beliefs

The Housewives ask Gebbia about her witchy beliefs. She says she believes in a goddess more than she believes in a god. In a talking head, Giraud laughs and says, "That is so silly to me. Come on. Gimme a break. I have a god that is so much more powerful than any witch in the world." JUDGY.

Yolanda Implies Joyce Isn't Leading Her Party

Yolanda Foster tells Giraud she needs to lead her party and get in the pool.

Lots of Arguments About Rhetoric

• Kyle says the "get in the pool"/"lead your party" thing is "peer pressure." Gebbia says, "don't say peer pressure."
• Giraud, Glanville, and Vanderpump argue over Giraud's use of the word "bullying."
• Vanderpump and Kim Richards argue over Giraud's use of the word "bullying." Vanderpump shushes Kim.

Kyle and Yolanda Yell At Each Other About Interrupting

During the group dinner, Foster asks, "Is there a problem, Kyle?" And Kyle is like, "you and I need to have a conversation." About what? Oh right. The forever-simmering reunion drama. Kyle is like, "let's agree to disagree," but Foster is like, "meh, I lost my respect for you, but whatever." And THEN, Foster keeps telling Kyle to stop interrupting her, so then they have a fight about interrupting. And they keep interrupting each other during their fight about interrupting.

Brandi... Oh, Brandi

And yes, Glanville takes the "get into the pool" fight waaaay too far. To quote Kyle: "Did that really just come out of your mouth?"