Entertainment

You've Thought These Things While Watching 'GoT'

by Jefferson Grubbs

Is there any show on television right now that puts its viewers through more of an emotional wringer than watching Game Of Thrones ? HBO's fantasy series has some of the highest highs in TV history ("Dracarys!"), but also some of the lowest lows (Red Wedding, anyone?). Within one episode, you may have an innocent young girl being burned alive at the stake, followed immediately by a queen soaring triumphantly on the back of her fire-breathing dragon. It's no wonder many viewers finished Game of Thrones Season 5 feeling like they didn't know what had happened (in the best way possible, of course).

Of course, Thrones isn't the only show in history to deliver devastating plot twists and epic action. But showrunners David Benioff & D.B. Weiss are doing so on an unprecedented scale — in terms of cast, location, effects, and budget — which makes it all the more impressive. And if you're anything like me, you've had some conflicting feelings over the years while subjecting yourself to the emotional abuse that is Game Of Thrones. Obviously I can't speak for everyone, but chances are good that, if you're a loyal Thrones viewer, you've had these thoughts sometime over the past five years:

1. So, This Show Is Like Lord Of The Rings, Right?

Sure, if LOTR had ice zombies and incest, and Frodo and Sam were both slaughtered at a wedding halfway through.

2. I'm Confused. Which Old White Dude With A Beard Is This?

Thanks, man.

3. So.

4. Many.

5. Beards.

Those are some cool chinstraps, dude.

6. How Many Names Does This Girl Have?

Daenerys. Dany. Khaleesi. Stormborn. The Unburnt. Mother Of Dragons. Breaker Of Chains. Mhysa. Jeez, pick one!

7. This Guy Is The Best.

Yes. Yes, he is.

8. This Guy Is The Worst.

Ugh.

9. No. Wait. This Guy Is.

Double ugh.

10. No Wait, This Guy Is.

How many terrible people can exist in one television show?

11. OK, We Have A Weiner. I Mean, A Winner.

Congratulations, Ramsay. You're officially the worst.

12. Aww, Look At The Cute Little Puppies!

Yes, there are puppies in that picture. Stop getting distracted.

13. NO WHAT?!

You don't kill the dog. You NEVER kill the dog!

14. Don't Trust The Sneaky Guy, Ned!

No one with that facial hair is trustworthy.

15. Told You.

Honestly, we should've seen this coming. Ned was played by Sean Bean, after all. He never lives through anything.

16. Dragons, Bitch!

Awww, yeah.

17. Literally WTF.

I have no words.

18. Boom Goes The Dynamite.

"It's not TV, it's HBO." Damn straight. This episode proved why that's totally true.

19. Hodor. Hodor Hodor Hodor.

Every day I'm Hodorin'.

20. Oh Look, A Wedding! Nothing Can Possibly Go Wrong.

Right? Right???

21. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?!

Smh.

22. Where Is Lady Stoneheart?

No but really, writers — where is she?!

23. Who Is Lady Stoneheart?

(This person hasn't read the books.)

24. Can These Two Have A Spin-Off?

Pretty please?

25. How About These Two?

Hilarity ensues.

26. FINALLY.

Can I get a hallelujah?

27. This Dude Is Awesome. He's My New Favorite Character.

I hope nothing bad happens to him.

28. #$&%@!!!

Shoulda worn a helmet.

29. Wait — Where Did Bran Go?

That's funny. I barely missed his endless scenes of trudging through the forest.

30. THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN IN THE BOOK.

RIP, Barry.

31. No.

Stop trying to make Dorne happen. It's not gonna happen.

32. No no no.

Just nope.

33. NONONONONONONONONO.

We must be masochists for watching this show.

34. YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES.

About time a dragon tore some shit up!

35. *speechless*

Sorry, allow me to pick my jaw up off the floor.

36. I'm Never Watching This Show Again.

Never ever ever.

37. How Long Until Next Season?

*starts counting days*

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